Life

**I wrote this in January and never posted it. I found it in my drafts and I feel like it still reflects my feelings of today....here ya go!

The last few weeks have been especially hard for me. I guess thats why I haven't wanted to blog. It's been hard to look at the positive things going on around me. Don't get me wrong, I love my children and I love my husband. But I miss my mother-in-law. Plain and simple. There are so many things that I need to talk to her about. So many things that I need her advice on. At times I think life is not fair. Why would she be taken from me at a time when I need her so badly. I know she is close, I feel her presence often. But man, it would feel so good to talk to her.

As some of you know, I had 2 miscarriages last year. TMI sorry. The first baby would have been born on Christmas 2009. The second one would have been born middle of February 2010. I had no idea how much these experiences would change my outlook on life. The first one was difficult emotionally. The second was even harder. Talk about a slap in the face. Am I not healthy enough to carry a child? Does Heavenly Father not think I am worthy enough? All of a sudden I view my kids as blessings and miracles. I treat my children in a different way now. I have always enjoyed my time with them but I have really started
to focus on how I treat them.

We want another baby so badly. Sometimes I feel selfish for wanting another one even though I already have 4. Honestly, I would have 10 kids if I could. I love pregnancy. I love newborns. Part of me just wants to prove that I can get pregnant again. I want to prove that I can have a healthy baby. Sounds crazy, I know!

So for now, I am trying to find joy in the things Heavenly Father has given me. We truly are blessed and I need to remember that when I start feeling down.

I love the beginning of a new year. I love that it forces me to reflect on my life and make changes. Hopefully by posting these it will keep me accountable.
New Year's Resolutions are:

1. Start exercising. This is going to be a tough one, but my body needs it.
2. Get more out of my scripture reading.
3. Be a fun mom. Enjoy the journey, not the destination.
4. Focus on the needs of people around me.

Cooper and Cody's room

I have been on a huge redecorating kick lately. It's so DANGEROUS!! I finished Natalie's room and moved on to the boy's room. Here is the final paint color. I'm slowly adding things to the walls to personalize it.



** My picture taking skills are HORRIBLE....sorry!

Happy Birthday Cooper

We celebrated Cooper's 9th birthday on March 26th. I still can't believe my oldest child is 9 years old. It makes me feel really old!!
On the night of his birthday we took him and some of his friends to the Monster Truck Jam at Santa Ana Star Center. Taylor is contracted with them so we had some major hook-ups. We were able to get a suite for Cooper's party. It worked out perfect!! The kids could run around as they please and not have to sit throughout the whole show.
Before the show started, we got to go down on the track and see the monster trucks up close. The boys were in heaven! The night was a complete success, especially since I didn't have to clean my house after a birthday party. :)

Hello Out There........

Why is it so hard to keep up with my blog lately? I can keep up with facebook, check my email, download songs from itunes, but for some reason blogging is such a torturous task. We have had a lot of fun adventures and I wish I was better at journaling about it. I keep telling myself that I will get caught up......eventually.

Life has been good lately. Busy, but good!

1. I have successfully potty trained Eli....Hallelujah! I have no children in diapers, can you believe it?
2. Baseball season has started. Cooper is in Minors now and Natalie is playing softball. They both love it!
3. We've made several trips to AZ. And no, the trip doesn't get any shorter. :) I got to hold and love on my sister's twins. They are so precious!
4. Natalie and I redecorated her room. She got to pick the bedding and the wall colors. I think she did a great job.

**So, for all you blog followers out there that are still paying attention to us, here are some pictures for you. ENJOY!

Joshua Dean and Tyler Michael

My sister had her twins on January 2nd!! It has been a long hard pregnancy for Marlene but she did a wonderful job bringing these boys into the world. I am grateful that the Lord has blessed our family with these sweet little boys. Josh and Tyler were born at 35 weeks so they will be in the NICU for a couple weeks, but for the most part they are doing well. Congratulations Marlene and Ben, they are absolutely precious. I can't wait to come see them!
TYLER

TYLER

JOSH

JOSH

Christmas Tree and a Special Visitor

One of my favorite Christmas traditions unique to our family is going up north to the mountains and cutting down a Christmas tree. The last couple of years I was unable to go because Eli was just too young to go. This year was fun because I finally got to go! There was a ton of snow on the ground and Eli was a complete stinker which is why I have no pics of us ACTUALLY cutting down the tree. We stopped off at a little cafe afterwards and got some hot chocolate and lunch. The kids enjoyed decorating the tree once we got home. They really took their time placing the ornaments. I think it is neat that they take pride in the tree they picked out.
This weekend Taylor's little sister, Jennifer, came to visit us. My kids have been looking forward to this for 2 weeks. They were so excited! I am so grateful that my kids get along with their Aunt so well. I enjoyed hanging out with her too, we ate lots of sugar cookies, laughed at my hubby, played with the kiddos and watched a hilarious movie. :-)
I was sad to see her go but hopefully we'll be going to AZ again soon to visit.

A Lost Tooth.......

Natalie lost another tooth! When we finally realized that it was loose it was barely hanging on. Taylor noticed it one morning before school and offered to pull it out. Natalie willingly allowed Taylor to "try". I am so proud of her! No tears, no whimpering and no apprehension. I just love my girl and how stinkin tough she is!


My toughest challenge......

Eli is spunky, witty, full of energy, stubborn as all get out, cranky, moody...I could go on and on. Taylor says he's bipolar. He can be happy one minute and on the floor screaming the next. He makes me feel like a rookie parent. I can honestly say that he runs this house. Everything we do or don't do is because of Eli. I love him to death, how can I not? He is so adorable. But man is he a challenging kid!